I saw him interviewed by Oprah and recognized the value in his thinking.
He writes about expressing love in five different ways and the importance of finding your partner's 'language'. I understand his idea that everyone doesn't 'speak the same language', because I have always told my husband, "Don't tell me you love me, show me". And he does- buying groceries, preparing meals, etc. after 56 years.
These are the love languages according to Gary Chapman:
-words of affirmation
-acts of service
This is a good reminder of all the thoughtful things that can be done to make life more satisfying for a couple. Although 'receiving gifts' isn't really of interest to me, I do love a new puzzle book every once in a while- especially when it took a lot of searching to find the kind that I enjoy.
And 'words of affirmation' are always necessary. Who doesn't appreciate a compliment or a word of encouragement?
Gary Chapman's research shows that the 'in-love state' only lasts a couple of years. So when the real work begins, it is helpful to know the 'love languages'.
"Inside every child is an 'emotional tank' waiting to be filled with love. When a child really feels loved, he will develop normally, but when the love tank is empty, the child will misbehave".